Trying to Celebrate…

09/10/2009

A NATIONAL HOLIDAY!!!

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09-09-09

So since this is my Golden Birthday and it’s supposed to be Lucky, I’m going to do as Jill Scott says and you’ll catch me “Living my life like it’s golden…golden. Golden…Golden!” Today is the day that I turn 29!!

It will forever go down in history as the most awesomest b-day ever in my life. Not because of what has happened on today exactly, but because of all the possibilities there are to come during this year of life. As I embark on my last year in my Trying Twenties and teeter on the edge of my Flirty Thirties, I am compelled to stop and reminise on my earlier and later twenties and think about how far I’ve come and where I’m expecting to go.

I can remember in my early twenties that I used to cater to other people’s emotions and let them make me feel bad about who I was and what I did. As I entered my late twenties, I’ve learned to take my feelings into consideration and let go of those people who do not support me or love who I’ve become. It’s nice to know that you don’t have to be friends with everybody… 🙂 Stop being a people pleaser.

I can also remember that I had a plan in my early twenties. Do you realize that when I graduated college, I was supposed to have been recruited by a Fortune 500 corporation, marry my college sweetheart two years after graduation, and technically would have had my second child as of this year. Funny how that works. I actually was blessed to stay in school longer and attend my university’s MBA program for free. Though I had some horrible jobs, I’ve been blessed to gain experience to work myself up to a semi awesome job. I have been successfully single for the past 4 years and been free to live life to the fullest. I have truly gotten to know myself , my goals, aspirations, pet peeves, likes, dislikes, with me, my family, friends, and especially relationships with men. I’m sooooo good at 29 right now, I think I’ll stay in this selfish place a bit longer.

And as far as jobs go, in my early twenties when I was supposed to get recruited by that awesome corporation, that didn’t pan out. Though I was dissapointed then, I can actually be thankful now that it didn’t. I have learned that you can work your fingers to the bone in some corporate settings and you still get laid off or end up feeling that your efforts went in vain. It is more important to realize that you are an excellent person, not just a 9-5 excellent employee. It wasn’t until my late twenties that I realize that I was not corporate material and now that I’m 29, I’m seeking other career paths that I will be happy working at attaining. It’s about making time for loved ones, finding your purpose, and making loads of money doing it.

Now the question is (in my 29th year of life), how do I get there? What’s next for me? It is now that I rely on my visions of granduer that in my Flirty 30’s, I’ll have it all figured out. I’ll finally know what it is I’m supposed to be doing and I’ll know the path that I’m supposed to go down to get there. It is then that I’ll know if my businesses will take off and provide enough for me to retire from corporate America. It is then that I’ll know how to love again and possibly realize that I do want to get married and have kids….It’s been a toss up since my mid twenties. It is then that I’ll know the awesome person that I am to become and He will have mapped it all out for me because he answered that prayer. But in my opinion….the reason that I’m so excited about 29….is because it all starts now. In order to be awesome in 30, I somehow have to make some big strides in 29 and I pray that it is an eye opening, adventurous, positively joyous ride of preparation, while enjoying where I am in the moment right now.

During the year of 29, it will bring all the things that were stolen from me and I will have to want no more. I know that sounds crazy, but in my early twenties, I have let persons steal things like my joy, my excitement, my achievements, my pride, my money, my self esteem, and they have literally killed the old me….and I let them. Now, I’m taking it all back. And He will bless me doubly. Funny, how you think you know everything when you’re in your early twenties, but I can honestly say that I’ve had to throw most of that inate information on life, friendships, men and careers, out the door. The only thing to hold onto is that you must know how you want to be treated and what you will and won’t stand for. From there, you let people in accordingly and realize that they weren’t raised how you were all the time.

So 29 has to be great! I look back at my early twenties when I had a significant other to celebrate with. It wasn’t till my mid twenties that I realized that some of those birthdays were some of the worst. Since 25, I’ve been without someone to make that birthday extra special, but this is the first year that I just didn’t care. I’ve GROWN. I’ve been out of the dating game for sooooo long that when special times in my life arise, I’m not angry….I’m actually joyous that I can make my own awesome plans, hang out with my girls, and celebrate my birthday the WHOLE month with NO DRAMA.

Ladies, be thankful for your girls and your homeboys that love you. Love them back and feel good when you wake up on your birthday morn with 10 text messages and 14 voicemails dawning birthday well wishes, blessings and renditions of Stevie Wonder’s Birthday song.

I’m thankful for the homeboy who called me at midnight to be the first to scream out “Happy Birthday”. I’m Thankful for the homeboy that got his momma to make me her world famous Red Velvet Cake that we swooned over in college. Also, the homeboy that bought me a Jason Mraz concert ticket to help me celebrate my birthday month. And we cannot forget the homegirls, that suffered with me in the 90 degree heat at the outdoor concert to see my favorite 90’s bands. My girl who got me the best b-day card ever that spoke volumes to where I am in this life. And let’s not forget the homegirls that offered up dinner and drinks for my special day.

Last, but not least, be thankful for the family that hosts a dinner and best of all gets you an awesome Birthday Cake dripping with icing. I CUT for Cake!

Where most people are freaking out about getting older, I’m actually excited to be 29 , getting better, and enjoying my family and friends along the way. Figure out what’s important to you and go for it….If you figure it out now, your Trying Twenties, might not be so Trying…