Trying to Listen…


Especially when you are waiting for Him to speak to you about something you’ve been waiting on, carrying on about, or just plain given up on.

Last night, I was in such a place of discontentment about work, finances, my living situation and my friend’s facing certain issues in their lives.  I just had to cry out “Help us, please! Make us come out of this place and let us be Awesome!” It’s something I want so badly for my friends and I, to not just make it through life, but to do it fabulously and flawlessly.

I had to ask Him to make some things right in my life and fix the many mistakes we may have all made at some point in time in our lives.  Here’s some of the things I had to put on His mind last night, because they were on my heart.

-Mistakes about money, especially where I’ve been too generous to people and they have not paid me back.  This only leaves me to live with the regret of lending and having to pay back the debt solo.  My desire is to be debt free, but I need the finances to support debt repayment and will be enough to not incur future debt. I actually want to pay my bills…Go figure!

-Being in a place in life where nothing is coming together and you just want to give up because you can’t see the purpose.  People always say that you have to move and show Him, but they don’t know what you’ve done and been through. And it’s especially hard when work becomes a struggle to go to everday and you’re just trying to stay positive and be thankful you have a job anyway to go to.

-Feeling a sense of purpose and usefulness.  A job, nay, a career opportunity that you LOVE and that challenges you.  You feel alive there and you make the money you truly desire to make.   I had to really speak on that to Him and vent frustrations of having a higher degree and for what….I haven’t had a job that has appreciated it, nor have I been compensated for having obtained it.

-Guidance on deciding what’s next for you life.  Often times we get an idea in our minds about pushing forward, thinking that idea was a blessing that comes from Him.  After doing everything according to His word, sometimes we are left Dissapointed and Angry. Especially, when we have gone the distance in preparation and implementation in His name, BUT it never came to pass.  I,  personally, am looking to purchase my first home.  I’ve often said to Him, that if this is not for me, let me know before I waste my money…LOL

-Direction to make my businesses a success.  He knows that it is my desire to retire from Corporate America by the time I’m 30.  I started these businesses in the midst of economic downturn and potential layoffs with my company to ensure that I could forge my way through this world without being dependent on it.  He’re the kicker, I’m about to be 29.   Help me get on the ball!

-And last, but not least, Blessings for my family and friends.  They all need and desire many things and I desire for them all to be Amazing.  Many have started businesses or changed careers, gotten married and have had kids, moved to a new city and just trying to live fabulously doing it.  I just don’t want them to write a book, but want it to be a New York BestSeller, sell millions of copies nationwide, have an international book tour AND be on Oprah’s Book Club.  I want so badly for my friends and their endeavors to just Do It Real Big.

So the point of this long request, is to inform you all that if you’re searching for an answer, know that He is not going to descend and say “What’s Up?!”  He doesn’t roll like that.  You have to be listening to hear His word and surprisingly, you’ll recognize it. 

My testimony involves a radio segment on the Tom Joyner Morning Show.  The guest speaker encouraged Blacks in America to take hold of what we have and make it better!  The one statement that got me was “Out of Nothing Comes Much”.  “Be productive in this economy and be empowered during these down times to start and maintain a business, especially if you are looking for work.  Buy a home if you can, right now!”, he urged.   I was inspired right then and there as I brushed my teeth.  OMG, He got me on that one.

Okay, so that’s half my answer, right.  So when I get to work, I received Today’s Word with Joel Osteen, titled Twice as Much.  Now, my mom had always mentioned that the He will always give you Double for Your Trouble, but this was exactly what I was supposed to hear today.  Joel promised that He desires to give you back double for what has been stolen from you!   I believe WHOLE HEARTEDLY that this is a Double Blessing for your mistreatment in life, your layoff, your not getting that promotion you deserved, your incurred debt due to others, AND your lost joy due to hurtful situations in life.  

This is a blessing for real and I’m taking it today.  How about you?


Angel Elexa – Trying to Listen

LIVE life, LAUGH about it, and LOVE those who love you back.



  1. Thank you for sharing this. Your words are touching and meaningful and I can totally relate. I only hope for the very best for you. God bless and keep on being fabulous!

  2. I think i need to hear that their is someone else that is trying to figure out this maze we call life. Im to chicken to write down my thoughts…i don’t think i would be able to stop if i ever started…lol

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